When doing your best isn’t good enough…

Standard

I’ve been searching my brain this evening for a good topic to write about, and it basically smacked me right in the face a couple hours ago when I opened my University transcript and saw a nice big F next to my Calculus course.

Failure.

I don’t think I’ve ever failed a class, ever. I actually feel fairly convinced that it’s not possible that I got that grade because I left that exam feeling pretty confident about it (yes, I am contesting my grade and will be seeing how I did so badly on it), but the truth is I’m really afraid. I’m afraid to go to my teacher’s office and to see that I did, as a matter of fact, fail. What do you do when your 100% isn’t enough to get you through?

I’d love to be able to pep-talk myself here, but the truth is I really can’t. I’m too worried and nervous. What if, even when I try to fix my grade, I’m stuck with that big disgusting F? I don’t know how to come back from that, especially when I need the class to get into my program of choice.

What do you do when you work towards a goal that you can never quite reach? What path do you take next, when the one ahead of you has a big huge roadblock? Do you try and get through it, or do you turn around and try a new road?

I didn’t have any other options for myself if this happened, I kind of just assumed I’d find a way to make it through. Right now I’m still crossing my fingers and hoping that there’s a big mistake somewhere that can be fixed and give me the grade I need, but if I’m being realistic I shouldn’t get my hopes up.

I need to start thinking about a Plan B. I don’t know where to go from here.

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5 responses »

  1. Mel you’re one of the smartest/most motivated people I know. You’ll find a way to work around this believe me.<3

  2. Oh, gosh. I’m so sorry this happened. I remember making a C- in Pre-Calculus and jumping for joy like it was an A. Not an easy class at all!

    When I first started college, I made two D’s in Anatomy & Physiology. Worst feeling ever! You feel so defeated and no matter how much work you put in, it wasn’t good enough.

    I hope you find some answers when you talk to your teacher. I’m sorry. 😦

  3. Oh no! Well, don’t be afraid to go in and talk to your professor. Hopefully its wrong but if its not, it isn’t a goal you can’t reach. You can pass Calculus! Sending positive energy your way!

  4. I dropped out of both calculus classes I ever tried to take – and I love math. Not an easy class at all. I’m sorry that you didn’t get the mark you were expecting, and I hope speaking with the prof will result in a better mark.

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